Kids say the darndest things

After nearly 19 years of raising children, I finally heard the few simple words that make the journey of parenthood all worthwhile.
"I didn't appreciate our family until I went away," our oldest daughter told me when I visited her at college last weekend.
First, I thought I was going to choke on my food and cry at the same time. Then, I fought the urge to fall to my knees, raise my arms to the heavens and shout "Hallelujah!" I didn't want to cause a scene in the restaurant.
Unexpected, unprompted and unplanned, the acknowledgment that we were appreciated, that all we have done all these years was noticed and had value — the revelation completely and forever altered this parent-child relationship.
From her mouth to my ears, my heart leapt with joy. I knew in that single instant, that pristine moment, that I had reached a new milestone in parenting.
Like a farmer in the field, it's been head down, butt up, toiling thanklessly — and without expectation of any thanks — since the first diaper change.
In the early years, you do stuff you never imagined you would; details never fully explored in the parenting books. You function on no sleep, clean up puke, fish stool samples from the toilet for diarrhea testing, comb scalps for head lice, and entertain 10 five-year-olds for a birthday party.
You do this and more. You sacrifice. You put their needs first. You love unconditionally. You do it — all of it — because that is what parents do, or should do. And, more importantly, because you would never think not to do it. It's in the hard-wiring.
As the years pass, parenting takes a new form. Gears shift from physical to mental and emotional. The exhaustion wrought by infants and toddlers is replaced by teens testing the wits and fueling self doubt.
Every limit, every rule, every consequence, every spat ... we second guess ourselves and reevaluate what once seemed reasonable and rational.
Are we crazy? Are we too demanding? Are the expectations too high? Should we have come down so hard or were we too easy? Throw in cell phones, facebook and driver's licenses, and the potential for disaster multiplies exponentially.
We worry. We reassess. We gain and concede ground. Are we right? Wrong? Did we over/under react?
And then, after moments like last weekend, we're left wondering whether we're genuinely wise and gifted or particularly lucky that we just might be doing okay.